Illustration for article titled Deep Cuts: Burn It All Down

Welcome back to Deep Cuts. Please buy this hot junk that’s on sale so that we can’t.

Woodcut Calligraphy Sign, $28 (was $44) Throw that top one in the fireplace and the bottom one on the mantel.

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Moto Mom Jeans, $35 (were $70) These are my favorite jeans. Seriously.
Moto Mom Jeans, $35 (were $70) These are my favorite jeans. Seriously.
AX Paris Plus Duster Coat, $63 (was $95) Not enough clothes come in the color of Silly Putty.
AX Paris Plus Duster Coat, $63 (was $95) Not enough clothes come in the color of Silly Putty.
Crystaltastic Nails, $19 (were $40) These are so ugly that I think they might be pretty again.
Crystaltastic Nails, $19 (were $40) These are so ugly that I think they might be pretty again.
Cut-Out Flower Shell Top, $24 (was $84) So delicate.
Cut-Out Flower Shell Top, $24 (was $84) So delicate.
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Nook Shelf, $99.99 (was $169) Or come over and build this for me? I'll make you lemonade and let you take your shirt off.
Nook Shelf, $99.99 (was $169) Or come over and build this for me? I'll make you lemonade and let you take your shirt off.
Silk Chiffon Dress, $79.99 (was $365) My sister Nancy wore this when she was a groomsman and pretty much killed it.
Silk Chiffon Dress, $79.99 (was $365) My sister Nancy wore this when she was a groomsman and pretty much killed it.
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Guess what this is. Guess. Do it. Don't click the link, just guess.
Guess what this is. Guess. Do it. Don't click the link, just guess.
Splat Ombre Hair Color, $7.99 (was $10.99) I'm like 99% sure this is super ugly and 1% sure I have no idea what I'm talking about.
Splat Ombre Hair Color, $7.99 (was $10.99) I'm like 99% sure this is super ugly and 1% sure I have no idea what I'm talking about.
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Chanel Necklace, $1,595 I will do literally anything for this. ANYTHING. Whatever just popped into your head? The answer is, "Yes, I'll do it."
Chanel Necklace, $1,595 I will do literally anything for this. ANYTHING. Whatever just popped into your head? The answer is, "Yes, I'll do it."

Contact the author at jane.marie@jezebel.com.

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