One of the greatest joys in life is finding a four-dollar product in the drug store that puts higher end versions to shame. Just kidding, it’s becoming a mother. Just kidding, it’s fucking a rapper. Just kidding, it’s making enough money to buy a vacation home and then going there for extended periods of time, alone. Yep, that’s it.

Anyway, this eyeliner from Prestige is awesome. If you’re brave, you could try putting it on your upper eyelids for a real ‘90s look, I guess, but the only thing I do with mine is line my lower waterline. This technique creates the illusion of larger peepers by expanding the whites of your eyes. What makes this particular white special is its opacity: it goes on BRIGHT WHITE, highly pigmented, and it’s kind of thick so it has real staying power. I’ve cried through this stuff at a Lady Gaga concert and it stayed put. (I wasn’t crying because of Lady Gaga, I was just sad, but at a Lady Gaga concert no one takes their eyes off Lady Gaga so it’s a good place to cry if you have to cry in public.)

Don’t poke your eyes out!


Contact the author at jane.marie@jezebel.com.